FIVE OF HEART ATTACKS.

The news that Dick Cheney suffered his fifth heart attack reminded me that my game, DISCARDING THE REPUBLICAN STACKED DECK, is really becoming outdated.  When I made the game, in 2004, the Republican deck seemed permanently stacked.  Ronald Reagan, Ken Lay and Jerry Falwell were alive, James Traficant was in prison, and Rush Limbaugh was on the radio, tricking millions of people into voting against their own interests.  Well, I guess everything hasn't changed.

Dick Cheney, in healthier times.

The game was a lot of fun to play, provided you read five newpapers and spent ten hours a day watching MSNBC, CSPAN, CNN, FOX NEWS, and listening to Public Radio.  The object of the game was to be the first to discard all your Republican cards into the dumpster after drawing the appropriate DISCARD CARD.

I ran into some problems, however, such as trying to find really gigantic cards, and/or really tiny dumpsters.  I ended up using the empty tins from curiously expensive mints as makeshift dumpsters.

         Makeshift dumpster.

The game starts out with the Republican cards being evenly divided among the players.  How often do you see "evenly divided" and "Republican" in the same sentence? 

     Some of the cards

               

  

      Jokers to the left. . .

         

                             Bushes out of control.

The only good cards are the DISCARD cards.

An unlucky pick will yield an "R" card, instead of a DISCARD card.

An "R" card means you have to wait until your next turn for a chance to deposit a Republican into the dumpster.

The next version of the game will be called DISCARDING WHAT'S LEFT OF THE REPUBLICAN STACKED DECK.  A new feature will be a toxic dump site for those that have already been discarded.